Journey with pregnancy #2

I have put off this post for a while just because I wanted to get at least half way through our pregnancy. So we had hoped for boring, but what would life be without a tad bit of drama. With this pregnancy we had thought because there was only ONE this time, that I would get to sit back and enjoy what most get to with out the doctors visits constantly. At 9 weeks we found out pretty quickly that, that unfortunately, was not going to be the case for us. Before I go into much detail I just want to clarify I am not a genetics genius nor do I have a doctorate degree so I may be wrong in some of my details but I'm just going off of how I understood what I was told! So here goes...


We found out at week 9 I was a positive carrier for a rare antibody called antibody E (the Capitol letter is important apparently- there is such a thing as just antibody e). This is similar to the rH factor that everyone has come to know quite well but does not have an easy fix like the Rhogam shot does. So down to the basics- when Blake and Conor were born one of them carried the protein E: this was simply because Zach has the protein E in his DNA. Ready for genetics again? So then once they were born this was then passed on to me (we have been assured this was not why they were born prematurely anyone with these rare antibodies will get information that shows it is not an issue with the first pregnancy but is with all pregnancies from there on out- Now back to the lesson!) my body then detected this new protein in my blood and started developing antibodies to it as it was foreign and did not belong.

The side effect? Well the antibody can then pass to new baby and start destroying baby's red blood cells causing anemia, this can then potentially cause jaundice, need for blood transfusions, prematurity, hemolytic anemia and in worse case scenarios still birth. So.... That sucks! But let's not focus on all that could go wrong- and let's focus on the positive. Because of all this we have been seeing a high risk doctor now since week 12 and see them every two weeks in hopes of staying on top of things, they draw labs every couple weeks to a month to see what my levels are- that's a whole other teaching moment that I'm still not sure I understand- all I know is my levels continue to rise which may lead us to having to do blood transfusions to baby while I'm still pregnant....but we will cross that bridge when we get there!

So on to the other bumps and twist along the way. Starting week 12 I have had ultrasounds every two weeks to monitor cervical length (trying to monitor and prevent premature breaking of water which is what happened last time) which all so far have looked good, we also were started on progesterone intramuscular injections in hopes of preventing preterm labor, I take those weekly. Zach has even had to give them a few times- by the end of this he will be a pro at giving shots! Even though I'm sure he'd rather not be.
So far it's been just as unboring as I could have suspected- I was extremely sick from weeks 9-18 throwing up a minimum of 5-7 times a day give or take. I had to at one point get IV fluids for dehydration. Thanks baby! But on the bright side since week 18 I have been feeling great, more energy, more kicks which is my favorite, and I am actually craving AND KEEPING DOWN food now!

So we are half way there- (big sigh) in less than three weeks is when my water broke with the boys- I was 23 and 3 today I am 20 and 5. It was this same time too, just four years ago. My water broke April 4th, just a mere 4 days away. Baby boy has surely kept us on our toes already, a few scares here and there- but I look forward to reaching our first goal- surviving and making in through April 4th. So start your prayers and positive thinking because from here on its pretty scary for us- but we know that with faith and lots of hope there is a plan for us!

- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone

ITS A.....

Surprise!

We have BIG news at the Hargis Household!

Merry Christmas!

We wanted to take the time to say Merry Christmas to all our friends and family and we hope you have a wonderful start to the new year! We know that this coming up year is going to be a doozy, lots of changes and Blake is turning 4! CAN YOU BELIEVE THAT?! 

Turkey Day

Happy Belated Turkey Day!

Thankful & Blessed

It's been a long time since I've felt the need to write, when emotions are too high and words seem to be building up inside... today those words need to come out. I find myself as the year goes on realizing how much I find myself looking for something greater, that if I change this or move that maybe I could find that greener side of things I always search for. I rarely take the time to be thankful for the story I have been blessed with.

I work in a cardiac ICU, I see mothers, and fathers die, brother, sisters, husbands and wives. I watch as children have to tell their parents goodbye, I see parents have to tell their children goodbye- and had I not had to hold my Conor and kiss his forehead and tell him to be with God I wouldn't understand how to be the nurse they need during that time. I wouldn't know how to find that compassion, that understanding. I stand holding loved ones hands, I hug them and I cry with them- and then I come home to my perfect family. To the loves of my lives and still find myself searching....

I read daily on social media that a friend or even a complete stranger is dealing with death of a loved one, or is standing strong facing illness themselves. And here I am in my house healthy, with my son- who, yes, has cerebral palsy but is alive and actually pretty healthy comparatively... And I'm wanting more...
I am truly way more blessed than I accept on a daily basis. I live in a beautiful love story, and only in the past few days have I began to try and be as thankful as I can be for it! I once wrote in my blog for prayers, for God to grant us with the privilege of being parents to Blake, and begged for the honor of being his mom and watching him grow. I remember asking for him to bless me with acceptance and understanding if that however was not his choice for us. Then once I got my prayer answered, I forgot to be constantly truly grateful for all the wonderful things God has graced my life with. Don't get me wrong I am thankful everyday for Zach and Blakers and even my crazy dog Aussie- but I forget to actually take a breath, look around me and truly just soak in the wonderfulness that IS my life. I sometimes forget to get off my phone, or out of my head....and just embrace life.

I found the love of my life at the age of 15, he has stood by me through all the angst of growing up. From the overly enthusiastic teenage Katie, to the party goer college Katie, to the "id rather stay home, mom" Katie. As I think of our love story it is what movies are made of... Boy meets girl, girl meets boy- they date- they have trials and they overcome them to end up in marital bliss.... But ours continues after the movie ends... And our true love story only blossomed more when we brought children into our love story. That is what makes our story even stronger and more romantic than any title you can imagine in your head. Our story didn't have the typical happy new parents beginning, it had loss and fear tangled into it. But the romance in it is the way we held on to each other despite the stress, despite the loss, the anger and the depression.

I remember one day I was outside, I had wanted some fresh air, and Zach came outside to check on me....he held my hand on the bench outside the women's hospital. And as I sat there, zombie eyed, in disbelief, without words only a day after we had just lost our son, he knew we didn't need to talk, we just needed to sit there with the sun hitting our backs as we held each other's hands. It's these moments I find truly romantic.

The romance in our love story, isn't always story telling- it is filled with boring laying on the couch listening to a new music album while snuggling, it's laughing uncontrollably over some stupid 90's movie that I'm still not sure is "the best movie ever", and our romance even involves the days I lose control of my emotions and just cry into zach's shoulder as he holds me close.

The day my love story surpassed "Notebook" worthy romance was the day we brought Blakers home. The day we were blessed to have this child by our side was the day I should have stopped looking for the greener side and realized I'd reached it. I was standing in it.

I want to cherish all the times that blake will grab my face just to turn it to look straight into his eyes- just so he can show me what he is finding so funny. I want to remember the sound of his laugh when I come home from a long 12 hours shift. I want to remember the way he points to his daddy when Zach walks in the room and then just smiles ear to ear.

Yesterday was a prime example of just taking a deep breath and instead of getting frustrated just enjoying the moment. And it turned out to be one of my favorite days. Blake was a complete fuss butt yesterday, he cut his therapy session short because he would not stop throwing a tantrum- he was just not having it. And then when I took him to school at 12, it wasn't even 5 minutes after getting home that the school nurse called saying he was inconsolable. So I calmly made the decision to just go ahead and go back into to town and get him. I knew Blake wasn't sick, he wasn't hurting, and that had I just said you know I really think he should try to power through the day- he could have probably stayed and finished the school day out.... But this was what I prayed for. I prayed constantly in the NICU to be his mother, to be his rock, to be able to spend time with him...AND, so I picked him up. As soon as he saw me his tears were gone, he smiled ear to ear and we left. We came home, and Blake was not sick. And Blake was not hurting. And Blake and I had one of the best mommy and Blakers day we've had in a while. We danced, we played and we snuggled. And for that I am thankful, and my grass just keeps getting brighter green!

Sometimes you just need to take a moment and close your eyes... Cherish your love story, because you never know how green your grass is compared to someone else.




































From my family to yours remember to fall in love with the everyday love stories!

BeetleJuice BeetleJuice.....

BEETLEJUICE!!!!