Story Time

"The GREAT Poop Situation of 2013."

A few weeks ago, Blake and I went to run errands in town. We had already had a few mishaps already for the day. We drove to our CPA's office to turn in a tax form- forgot it at home on the counter! Also had planned to cash all the checks for the T-shirts for march of dimes so I could pay for them and forgot all the checks. Major failure since that was the whole reason we had drove 15 minutes into town! So I'd already labeled this day as "just one of those days". On a positive note, I had Blake dressed in a cute pair of plaid shorts and a polo and he was looking mighty fly that day. it was definitely going to be a photo shoot kind of day once we got home! But first we went quickly into Kmart to grab two things! After picking up the "C" letter for Conor's wreath I was making and some fishing wire for some decorations for the big birthday party I had some time so we decided to look around. As I am talking to my mother in law on the phone Blake all of a sudden starts screaming...I hang up on Zach's mom very confused because Blake does not scream.....then I smelt it. "Really Blake you had to poop...now?!?!" Of course I did not bring in the diaper bag because I figured we could survive 5 minutes without it. WRONG! it was then when I followed the smell, I look down at my arm, my cardigan was covered in poop. Before you continue to read the story just know as a mom sometimes you do things that are kinda gross but can save a situation.... So, to continue! I quickly decide to take my cardigan off, it was a little worn and old anyway so.....I wipe thr visible poop on his back and leg with my shirt and head to the front to check out as quickly as I can. Listen I know your thinking "you still checked out?!" But listen its a long drive into town and I didn't want to come back! So as I'm checking out I try to avoid eye contact with the clerk because if I can smell it I know she can. We then proceed to the car, I am the mom jogging with her son, holding him with my arms stretched as far from my body as possible, mumbling to myself "i cant believe you pooped everywhere...really you had to poop now....etc etc etc" I felt like i looked like a bad cracked out mother all the way through the parking lot- people where definitely looking at me. I proceed to open the car door only to hit his head on roof of the car (great mommy, what else could go wrong!?) he stops crying I take off a diaper, that I swear is bio hazardous, and he then decides to pee on me, pee on the car, and pee directly in his eyes. I am laughing- maybe crying- probably both when I then look down and he is now POOPING all over the car.... I took off his clothes- threw his outfit and my cardigan away, placed him in the car seat DIAPER ONLY and we went home! The day was over after that, I laughed the whole way home....Blake on the other hand fell quickly to sleep as soon as he was strapped in the car seat.