Wednesday, December 31, 2014

2015 was over all a good year.

It had it's moments that I could have done without.

But those same times, that were hard, and heart breaking had these rare moments, that through the tough was perfection. Memories that I will forever remember!

Time has a way of getting away from you, from slipping away. Children grow up right before your eyes...
they go from baby....

to a little trouble making tot in the snap of a finger.

We have made huge strides with Blake's therapy, we've learned to pull up on furniture!

Which means our house is a little more messy than usual!

We've cut that mop on head.....

And now look WAY to old for mommy's liking!

We've gone on vacations,

Our biggest part of therapy this year is we've learned to take steps with our gait trainer (a bigger version of a walker) it's still a work in progress and it's going to take some time to get him to use it independently....but it sure was such a HUGE deal!

We've celebrated christmas.....

And are now looking forward to the new year to come! I have a's going to be the best one yet!

Saturday, December 6, 2014

My child

You were born so fragile, so weak, so small.
You fought so hard, but we didn't know if you'd make it at all.

You worked so hard, so determined and strong.
Your journey was so scary, and heartbreaking, and long.

You continue to fight, against all obstacle and odds.
But your story was more than our was God's.

It was his plan for you to live, for you to fight, everyday.
With help of the doctors, the nurses, and all the people who pray.

It was His will, for you to show the world that miracles are real.
It was His will for you to strive, for you to grow, for you to heal!

I'm thankful everyday for the life he gave you.
You amaze me with every single thing that you do!

Because of you, your daddy and I have grown more in love with each other.
I'm thankful everyday to be called your mother!

Conor James

I miss you the most when it's quiet. When it's dark and I lay trying to sleep. My brain hits a switch and I start to think. I wonder how your features would have changed. How you would have grown. How you would have interacted with your brother. I wonder what it would have been to be a mother of twins. To be exhausted, always have my hands full with the two of you. I wonder how I would have wrestled you two to the ground, lost it when you were both being crazy and loud. I wonder how I would have handled the stress. I wonder how different life would be. I wonder how great it would have been. When it's just me and my thoughts it's the worse. It's me yearning for what could have been. No one will ever fill that hole in my heart. It's been 2 years 7 months and 23 days since I held you in my arms- heart beating, your crinkled face, your soft skin. It's been too long since I felt you. I know this holiday you are spending with your great grandpa's and grandmas- you have friends in heaven, little ones playing with you. I know that there is a reason, and I know that you are taken care of but I miss you everyday. I love you Conor and I wish you the most merry Christmas with beautiful songs and lights and a happiness I know only those in heaven get to feel! I love you and I miss you everyday!

Monday, December 1, 2014

Merry and Bright

Tis the have Christmas tree needles on your floor, ornament glitter adorning every inch of your home, and hearing 100 different versions of "the Christmas song" playing in every place you go! We are starting to spread the holiday cheer here at the Hargis home. Glitter, music, and needles..... it's beginning to look a lot like Christmas!

"And think of him as living in the heart of those he touched.... For nothing loved is ever lost as he was loved so very much."

Tuesday, November 25, 2014


Sometimes all you need on a bad to see pictures of pure happiness! So I want to spread the love and share some Blakers smiles to brighten your day!

Are you happy yet?! Day brighter?!

Did that do it? Do you feel happy?

Yep that did it! Bringing smiles to the faces of anyone with a bad day! That's my child's job!

Videos galore!

Since I'm awful at keeping up the blog, I thought I'd make it up with videos! Blake has been working real hard in therapy these days, we are trying to prepare for preschool. Which by the way sounds crazy...Blake and preschool?! It can't be time for that! So in order for Blakers to go to preschool and not be required to have a wheelchair he must show that he can independently use his gait trainer/ we have been CONSTANTLY working on it. I'm sure he gets exhausted wears me out! But Zach and I hate to not push when he is so close, and we don't want him to just rely on a wheelchair because it's easier. So practice practice practice is what we do and I think we are getting pretty good at it!!

Just click the blue hyperlink to view the videos!

First steps without help from Momma, Daddy or Mimi!

This next video was the first time we took the locks off so he could turn and as you can see it's a learning process for sure!!! This is Blake trying out the gait trainer outside....a little wobbly but definitely still awesome!

And lastly a video that shows how funny and totally two Blakers can really be!! A video of Pure rotten-ness!!!!!

Sunday, November 23, 2014

Music Baby

We like to play to the beat of our own drum....or pot whatever you wanna call it!

YouTube Video

Tuesday, October 21, 2014

Certainly Special

Taking care of a special needs child is hard. It's frustrating, it's exhausting.

Being the parent to a special needs child brings feelings of worry, pain and constant questioning. What will be his struggles? Where will he be in 5 years? How can I prevent him from bullying?

When Blake was born we knew pretty much there was a 99% chance, after his brain bleed, that he would be diagnosed with cerebral palsy. The damage was so severe there was little to no chance that his muscle tone would not be effected. Even though we were told this in the NICU when he was officially diagnosed with cerebral palsy last year all my worries and questions came to the surface. My brain never stopping- will he, won't he, will it all be physical, will it be mental too? Our house isn't handicap capable, what about our vehicles? Question after question, thought after thought...sometimes I wish my brain would just stop and allow silence, even if only for five minutes. Five minutes without worry, without questions, without all of it. Just silence. Peace and quiet.

But alas, silence is not in my nature. So I've come up with a better idea. Acceptance! I'm a super planner so the idea of just being okay with not knowing what lies ahead of me is a sure fire way to get me flustered and provokes my searching for answers even more....but this least for today I'll let it be. Let it be. If he walks great, if he doesn't that's okay to. If he can't speak fully we will find a way for him to communicate, if he takes after his momma and decides to learn to talk and then never stop....well we will come to that when we get there haha! We might have to buy daddy ear plugs! If we have to make modifications to our house or cars that's okay too. Because no matter what the disability, no matter what he is able to do and what he isn't, it doesn't take away from the fact that Blake may just be....the coolest child I know! (And we have some pretty awesome cool kiddos in our lives!)

Saturday, September 13, 2014

Bad Blogger of the Year

Well, it is official I am the worst blogger ever! No post since July 23rd! Unacceptable! I could use the excuse that we've been busy, or life got away from me but honestly I didn't know how many people read or kept up with it---that was until I've been scolded by a few people asking why I haven't been here goes!

First update for those of you who don't see us often or follow on Facebook- our dear baby boy got his first big big boy haircut!

Looks like a totally different child huh?

We have made the most out of this summer planning, quite spontaneously, a little impromptu vacation to Chattanooga, TN which also included stops in Nashville and to the lake! It was a much needed week of relaxation and fun!

We enjoyed the downtown riverfront and aquarium, spent some time listening to some music.

We went up high hiking at rock city, and down low 1,000 ft underground to be exact at ruby falls!

We visited nashville, and enjoyed some time in the sun at kuttawa before heading back home too.

After all the fun of vacation it's always back to work! For Blake too! We have upgraded therapy and now have speech, occupational, and physical therapies weekly! He has started to regain some of his speech that he lost before the May stent in the hospital. He babbles, and has re-developed his "da" sounds which makes Zach such a happy and proud "da-da" and he even has been saying ah-zzzzzz (our dogs name) in his own special way!

Blake was fitted and now has his leg braces to help with his walking. Because of his cerebral palsy he walks with assistance on his toes- the leg braces help to keep his toes down to give him some stability! He is doing amazing in therapy since we got them!

We will try and keep the blog updated a little better with lots of cute pics and hopefully share some new videos with everyone.
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