My first Mother's Day. I will not lie, yesterday I had a hard day. Thinking of mother's day and how I wasn't suppose to be a mother this year, and then when I did I was going to have my first mother's day how I was suppose to have two healthy babies in my arms....it was a hard thought to process, and a hard day to look forward too. However, although I did find myself missing Conor today alot I found myself very at peace knowing I will one day see him again, and I felt him close to my heart today. I woke up this morning and was surprised by a beautiful diamond angel necklace from daddy and Blake in memory of Conor. It hangs right on my heart so when I am feeling sad and my heart is aching from the loss of one of my son's I can look down and know he is right in my heart where he belongs!
Blake had a great day again today, and Zach and I know that his little bro Conor definitely had a hand in his getting better. Blake has been struggling for a week now with his lungs. Blake had been requiring higher ventilator settings, still low oxygen requirements but Xray's kept showing one side of his lungs collapsed- it would alternate sides with each xray. Today however both sides are open, his ABG's have been GREAT!!! So good we have come down on his ventilator settings ALOT! Blake has been awake, wide eyed and interacting with Daddy and I all day!
Today Blake measured 13 inches, and is weighing 1 lb 13 oz. They will attempt giving him breast milk again tomorrow through his feeding tube. We look forward and hope he tolerates it tomorrow so he can keep getting bigger!
Today has been a blessed day with our Blake, and Conor has been in both of our minds alot today. Our two boys...one in Heaven and one on Earth, and their Mommy and Daddy love them both SO much. My first Mother's Day was spent loving whole heartedly the three most amazing men I know...I love you all SO MUCH- Zach, Blake and Conor Hargis!
Bathing my Baby
My angel Necklace from daddy and blake!
My Necklace with my boys names! Always in my heart